


Commitment Time

by PattRose



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Angst, Break Up Talk, M/M, Moonridge 2009, Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-04
Updated: 2013-08-04
Packaged: 2017-12-22 09:08:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/911422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PattRose/pseuds/PattRose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just how much does Jim love Blair?   Blair needs to know for sure.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Commitment Time

Commitment Time

By Patt

 

Susan’s prompt: Commitment

 

“Jim, would you like to have dinner at Claim Jumper tonight?” Blair asked. 

 

Jim smiled at the thought of having a Filet Mignon and said, “Yeah, you don’t have to talk to me about it twice. What’s the occasion?”

 

“I have some things to discuss with you. It can wait until we’re there,” Blair said. 

 

“You have my attention now. Did I do something wrong?” Jim wondered aloud. 

 

“We’ll discuss everything at dinner. You didn’t do anything wrong, I just have some questions and you need to answer them truthfully,” Blair reasoned. 

 

Jim would have chewed his lip in worry, but that wasn’t his bag, that was Sandburg’s. Blair worried his lip all the time. Usually over the dumbest things in the world. Jim was definitely worried, that was for sure. 

 

~~~~~

 

They sat in the booth at Claim Jumper and Jim was as nervous as he was on their first date. What had he done to make Blair take him out to ask him questions? He hoped that Blair didn’t keep him waiting all night long. 

 

“So Jim, I have a few questions to ask you and you have to tell me the truth, it’s the big thing here. Everything is going to be truthful from both me and you. There will be no secrets or lies. Are you ready?” Blair asked. 

 

The waiter came up and took their drink order, they both gave their order and Jim whispered, “Why are we in a restaurant if you want to discuss personal things?”

 

“I thought you would try to weasel out of answering them if we were at home. And there would always be a chance that we would be interrupted by someone,” Blair explained. 

 

“You mean, like here when the waiter was just here?” Jim said sarcastically. 

 

“Jim, you’re being difficult already and we haven’t even started yet,” Blair said angrily. “Do you just want to leave?”

 

Jim lowered his voice and said, “No, ask your questions. I’m sure they’re important if you made a date to ask them.”

 

Blair made sure the waiter wasn’t coming back yet and he whispered, “Do you love me?”

 

“Blair, that’s a really dumb question. You know I do,” Jim answered. 

 

“It’s not dumb. You never tell me you love me,” Blair said softly. 

 

“I tell you,” Jim said as he quickly tried to think of an example. The only problem was, he couldn’t. Blair was absolutely right. 

 

“No, you don’t tell me, do you?” Blair asked. 

 

“No, I don’t. I’m sorry,” Jim apologized like that would be the end of it. 

 

The waiter brought their drinks and took their food order and walked away once more. 

 

“Tell me,” Blair said. 

 

Jim leaned in towards Blair and he whispered, “I love you.”

 

“Jim, I didn’t even believe that. You don’t mean it. You don’t love me. I can’t believe I’m just figuring this out now.”

 

“Figuring out what?” Jim asked. 

 

“That you don’t love me. You think you do, but you don’t really love me,” Blair said very sadly. 

 

This time Jim didn’t whisper, he said, “I love you very much.” This time it was packed with meaning and concern for their future. 

 

“So you do love me?” Blair asked once again, somewhat confused. 

 

“Yes, Blair, I love you. I don’t know why you couldn’t have asked me this at home,” Jim said sounding somewhat annoyed. 

 

“You’re annoyed with me now aren’t you?” Blair inquired. 

 

“Yes, I am. We’re supposed to be telling the truth, so that’s the truth. You’re actually pissing me off.”

 

Blair didn’t say anything right away and finally said, “Why won’t you let me tell anyone from the bullpen about us?”

 

“It’s none of their business, Blair.”

 

“Are you ashamed of us?” Blair asked. 

 

“No, I’m not ashamed, but I think what we do in bed should be our business and our business alone,” Jim stated. 

 

“Are you sure you’re not ashamed of us?” Blair asked. 

 

“I’m sure. I’m telling you the truth, Blair. Now let’s get off that and go on to the next thing you want to ask me.”

 

“What if I wanted to be out?” Blair questioned. 

 

“Then we would have a problem,” Jim answered quickly. 

 

“So you don’t love me enough to be out?”

 

“Since when does loving a person enough have anything to do with being out? I have feelings for only you and I know you know how I feel. Why do you need more?” Jim asked. 

 

“I need a commitment. I need you to tell me you love me, tell me that we can be out and tell me you’re all right with that,” Blair said without taking a breath. 

 

“What if I don’t want to be out, but I still love you, what happens then?” Jim questioned. 

 

“Then we have a problem. I want to be out, Jim. I’m tired of being your secret and I want a commitment from you. I know we can’t get married, but at least have a ceremony with a preacher saying we belong to each other. That’s what I want,” Blair ranted. 

 

“I see. It’s all about what you want. It’s not about what I want or need, right?”

 

“Jim, if you really loved me, this wouldn’t be a problem,” Blair explained as best as he could. 

 

“Blair, I don’t want to break up with you if that’s where we’re heading. The idea of life without you in it hurts,” Jim said sadly. 

 

“All I want is a commitment,” Blair stated. 

 

“I’m not ready for that yet. Could we wait for a few months and talk about it again?” Jim wondered. 

 

“No, I’m done. I’m sorry it didn’t work out, Jim. I’ll miss you, but things weren’t going that well anyway,” Blair said coldly. 

 

“What are you talking about? What do you mean they weren’t going that well anyway?” 

 

“You have trouble showing anyone that you love them. You said you couldn’t do it with Carolyn and now I know why she gave up. I can’t do this anymore. I’m the only one working in this relationship,” Blair said. 

 

Their dinner came to the table and neither of them ate a thing. The waiter came over and said, “Is everything all right?”

 

Jim glared at him and said, “Everything is fine. Can we get these to go, please?”

 

“Certainly,” The waiter said as he grabbed the plates as quickly as he could and then brought them their bill. 

 

Jim put his credit card down on the bill and was having a hard time breathing. 

 

“Chief, I can’t breathe right,” Jim said softly on his way to a panic attack. 

 

“You better get used to the feeling, because I’m not only out of your life, but I’m moving out of the loft. I can’t stay there anymore. Too many memories,” Blair said flatly. 

 

“Jesus Christ. I can’t do this in a restaurant,” Jim spat out. 

 

“Whatever,” Blair said as he got up and walked out of the restaurant. 

 

Jim paid very quickly, grabbed their food and headed out to the parking lot. Blair was no where around. Jim listened with his hearing and scanned out for some distance and heard Blair about a block away. He must have run the entire way. Jim got in the truck and headed over to pick him up. 

 

He pulled up beside Blair and opened up the door. “Get in.”

 

“Don’t you tell me what to do, Detective Ellison. I can walk home if I want to,” Blair shouted. 

 

Jim shouted back, “Get in.”

 

Blair saw the raw pain and anger and decided not to push Jim right then. He would handle this when they got home. 

 

Blair got in and looked out the window and didn’t say a fucking word to Jim. Jim couldn’t take the silence at all. 

 

“I can’t break up with you, Blair. You’re my life,” Jim confessed. 

 

“Could have fooled me,” Blair answered. 

 

“I adore you, you idiot. I love you more then life itself. What more do you want?” Jim asked. 

 

“A fucking commitment is what I want, Jim,” Blair replied. 

 

“All right, we’ll tell our friends about us. I’ll do whatever you want me to do,” Jim said sadly. 

 

“Jim, this isn’t the way it works. You’ve supposed to want to be committed. Right now you sound like you don’t really want to, you just don’t want to be alone,” Blair said. 

 

“You’re right. I don’t want to be alone. I do love you and I want to tell our friends. Please don’t leave me, Blair,” Jim pleaded. 

 

“What else would you like to do?” Blair asked. 

 

“I would like for us to pick out rings and wear them. We’ve never been out and we should do it in style, don’t you think?” Jim offered. 

 

“Why are you turning your way of thinking to my way of thinking?” Blair wondered. 

 

“In the parking lot, I got a glimpse into my future without you and I realized I can’t do it without you in it,” Jim explained. 

 

Jim pulled over to the side of the road and pulled Blair into his arms. “I love you, Blair. More then anything in the world and I wish to be in your life forever. Will you be mine?”

 

Blair got tears in his eyes and answered, “Yes, I’ll be yours. I love you so much, Jim.”

 

“So we’re okay now?” Jim asked. 

 

“We’re better then okay now. Thank you, Jim. I needed to hear you ask me to be yours. I needed that more then breathing. I love you.”

 

“I love you, Blair. Now let’s go home and discuss this commitment ceremony and how we’re going to tell the gang,” Jim suggested. 

 

“Sounds good to me, Jim.”

 

The end


End file.
